A Lesson on Fulfillment from a Pasta Strainer

I love a good analogy. I find that using something physical to describe something mental can help a lot of people better understand a concept. I’ve been writing a lot on analogies lately, but this one is one of my favorites.

I was washing my pasta strainer a few weeks ago and noticed that when I had the water pressure on high, the strainer retained a good amount of water, despite the holes. More water was going in than going out, but even though that was the case, it never really got past 1/3rd full. Suddenly my English-major, metaphor-lovin’ mind realized that it’s kind of the same thing with people.⁣
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If we aren’t whole, if we haven’t worked on ourselves (understanding our mind, our passions, our history, our triggers, our trauma, our values, our joys, etc.), no amount of anything will fill us.⁣
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Yes, you might feel fulfilled for a bit when the water is on full blast, when you like your job, when your health is good, when your relationships are going well, when the sun is shining and the birds are chirping… but what about when that faucet of fulfillment turns off? Or the water pressure goes down just a little bit? Suddenly, you’re a lot more aware of those holes.⁣
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When that external fulfillment goes away (whether it’s attention, validation, love, joy, etc.), the amount of water (or fulfillment) going in becomes less than what’s going out. And you’ll quickly realize how empty you are.⁣
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For real fulfillment, we need to work on filling those holes, and we also need to be in control of that faucet as much as possible. We do that by not seeking external fulfillment, and instead, finding that joy and validation within ourselves.⁣